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May 17, 2021

So on Tuesday, I had to crawl through the back window of my house after locking myself out of my house - wait for it - twice. 

On Friday I had one of my "Sweating buckets, getting dizzy, can't decide if I'm going to have explosive diarrhea, vomit or passout" sessions. This now has fairly nasty stomach pains. I injured my stomach on Tuesday with a nasty scrape. This is Friday. 

I wake up a few times during the night. It hurts to move in bed. Each time I wake up, the pain is moving higher up my body. We've gone from belly button, up higher and higher, and now my chest is tight, and I'm having issues taking a deep breath.

The question and conversations that go through your head when you can't decide if you're having a heart attack or not were not what I had expected. One would think if you thought you were having a heart attack you would call 911. Not me. I know how much an ambulance is, and my Dad was thrifty, and apparently so am I. 

I am also the son of my Mom who never wanted to be a bother to anyone. She always put others first. 

The good news is I was not having a heart attack. So what was it? When I asked the mirror it lied. 

I now think it was a delayed reaction to just beating the crap out of my stomach - twice. That caused the tightness in my chest. The hospital show triggered the sweats (and later the intense pain in my stomach would cause sweats). In the end, I'm not sure. 

It does make you think when you have to take a breathe and realize that your number might is being called and your time is up. I am not ready or prepared for any of that, and death doesn't care. It's coming if you're ready or not. 

Kiss everyone you love to kiss and hug. Let those you appreciate know it. You never know when your time is up.